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Here Are 15 Remakes of ’90s Movies Already in the Works, and We Are Not Excited

©Paramount Pictures

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Unlike 1980s movies, which have started to age poorly in light of recent feminist movements like #metoo (looking at you, Sixteen Candles), 90s movies tend to hold up well, aside from the pretty heinous popular fashions of the time. For some reason, the fact that these movies are still essentially perfect isn’t stopping Hollywood from thinking they could use a remake.

So, without further ado, here are 15 remakes in the works that honestly, we didn’t ask for and we don’t want.

#15. The Matrix

Photo Credit: Warner Bros.

Okay, it’s not getting a remake (thank goodness) but they are considering making a 4th. I say if you make a trilogy everyone loves, walk away and never look back.

#14. Indecent Proposal

Photo Credit: Paramount Pictures

When the original features Demi Moore, Robert Redford, and Woody Harrelson, so there’s nowhere to go but down.

#13. The Mighty Ducks

Photo Credit: Disney

This icon of the ’90s is getting a television reboot. Fine, but there’s no way anyone is taking Joshua Jackson’s place in my heart.

#12. Leprechaun

Photo Credit: Trimark Pictures

Horror movies are usually ripe for reboots, but I don’t know about this one, y’all. How do you top Jennifer Aniston?

#11. Big Trouble in Little China

Photo Credit: 20th Century Fox

Sequel alert! If the original cast comes back, maybe I’ll let it slide.

#10. Clueless

Photo Credit: Paramount Pictures

First off, can I just say there’s no way it’s been 23 years. And second…how are you going to top the original cast? You’re not. Leave it alone.

#9. Home Alone

Photo Credit: 20th Century Fox

This will no longer be a kids’ movie once Ryan Reynolds gets his hands on it – and retitles it Stoned Alone.

#8. Little Women

Photo Credit: Sony Pictures

With Emma Watson and Meryl Streep signed on, this could be the exception to the rule – we’ll all get to find out on Christmas, 2019.

#7. The Craft

Photo Credit: Sony Pictures

Not a reboot but a sequel – the jury is out until we see whether the original cast is coming back.

#6. Arachnophobia

Photo Credit: Disney

Remaking a Frank Marshall horror film is like re-painting a Warhol.

#5. Hocus Pocus

Photo Credit: Disney

This is one ’90s movie that (I’m sorry) doesn’t hold up at all. I have no idea why it’s such an iconic film for so many, and we certainly don’t need another (especially not a made for TV).

#4. Ace Ventura: Pet Detective

Photo Credit: 20th Century Fox

No one will ever be Jim Carrey, so why even bother?

#3. Men in Black

Photo Credit: Sony Pictures

Some might be swayed by the appearance of Chris Hemsworth, but not I. I’ll keep Will Smith, thank you very much.

#2. I Know What You Did Last Summer

Photo Credit: Sony Pictures

Okay, so I know this wasn’t the greatest cast of actors ever, so maybe a remake could work?

#1. Jacob’s Ladder

Photo Credit: Sony Pictures

This needs to go away, and fast. Sadly, it’s got a tentative release date next year.

Go make another Spiderman and leave our classics alone, Hollywood.