We all like to joke about the silly, odd, frustrating, and annoying aspects of parenting.
That’s it. That’s the pitch – no ifs, ands, or buts about it.
So you know, if you’re a parent, these 12 tweets are going to see all too real.
12. As long as there’s coffee, everything will be fine.
Mostly. Probably. Don’t run out.
For all my parents out there, going through this every morning. pic.twitter.com/Akc79Lamfw
— Marcus A. Stricklin (@marcusthetoken) July 12, 2020
11. I wish I was this kind of mom.
I am the opposite sort of mom.
Moms will be like, "Don't know why I have a headache. All I did was eat a popsicle with my kids and nothing else 10 hours ago"
— Virginia McMurdo (@VirginiaMcMurdo) July 14, 2020
10. Or make that squeaking sound.
Whoever invented those is the worst.
You know you’re a parent when you’re mildly disappointed your new shoes don’t light up pic.twitter.com/vgkY6TEjC6
— That Mom Tho (@mom_tho) July 14, 2020
9. Isn’t it cute how they watch everything you do?
And then repeat it at the worst possible moment?
Me: (driving)You need to stop calling your sister names
9: She’s so annoying!
Me: Either way, name calling is wrong, it’s hurtf….HEY JERK FACE! HEARD OF SIGNALING??!!
𝐒𝐭𝐚𝐲 𝐭𝐮𝐧𝐞𝐝 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐦𝐲 𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐛𝐨𝐨𝐤
— Kids_kubed 🇨🇦 (@Kids_kubed) July 15, 2020
8. Kids are kind of magic, aren’t they?
For better or worse.
My 4yo was very difficult this weekend and I yelled more than I should have but tonight right before bed she hugged me and said “best friends forever!” and just like that she managed to erase all the bad moments and this kind of witchcraft is exactly why 4yos are so scary.
— Snarky Mommy (@SnarkyMommy78) July 13, 2020
7. I think that’s why they invented a Ken.
Why else would he be necessary? He has no genitals.
If you’re not using Barbie and Ken to make passive aggressive comments to your husband while you play with your kid, are you even married?
— Mommy Uncensored (@amomuncensored) July 15, 2020
6. Throw in some Netflix and he’s got it.
The trifecta, as George Costanza would say.
My 6-year-old: “I don’t need much in life. Just snuggle me and make me a burrito.”
I’ve never related to him more.
— Kristina Kuzmic (@KristinaKuzmic) July 12, 2020
5. You still had to stop and listen, though.
It’s a parent rule.
I can hear a kid screaming outside and it’s not one of mine so it looks like miracles really can happen
— ThreeTimeDaddy (@threetimedaddy) July 15, 2020
4. It’s a step in the right direction.
Though I doubt she would have cleaned it up afterward.
My daughter just asked to put a Diet Coke in the oven because she found a recipe for invisible ink in her spy kit that calls for baking soda. Frankly, I’m just happy she was willing to bake the soda herself instead of asking me to do it.
— Rhyming Mama (@sarabellab123) July 11, 2020
3. This is actually a necessary thing in life.
Where’s the Kickstarter?
a tinder app but you’re just swiping to find other parents to get drunk with
— Crockett🍀 (@CrockettForReal) July 14, 2020
2. She was also accidentally very quiet.
And sitting somewhere very out of the way.
10-year-old: I accidentally ate all the snacks.
Me: How is that an accident?
10: No one stopped me.
— James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) July 9, 2020
1. I don’t think a sore throat is a symptom.
Of course, you never can tell.
The defining moment of my parenting career is right here, right now, as I wonder if this sore throat is because I’ve yelled at my kids all day, or because the ‘Rona finally found me.
— Arianna Bradford (@TheNYAMProject) July 14, 2020
Isn’t it nice to know we’re not alone, though?
What’s the realest thing your kids have done this week? Tell us about it in the comments!