There’s no way to escape childhood without thoroughly embarrassing yourself, usually in an epic way, and almost always more than once. It’s just part of learning to be human, and let’s be honest – it’s not like adults are exactly immune.
If you want some reminders of how horrifyingly uncomfortable being a kid can be, these 14 people are mining their own most embarrassing moments.
14. So glad there are pics.
I was out with my mom why I was like 5 and she took me to the store. in this store, there were makeup samples so you can like to try out new makeup and stuff. I saw it and left my mom to go look.
I ended up smearing all kinds of makeup on my face. my mom did not see me leave so she went looking for me. when I was finally found I 1.) looked like a clown and had lipstick and eyeliner all over my face and 2.) my mom had the entire store looking for me.
my mom told me this story recently and showed me a picture of what I looked like. honestly, i am happy that i was too dumb to be embarrassed.
13. Spoiler alert: it never is.
alright. I forget how old i was, maybe like 5.
my dad was waiting in line for something i forgot what. I was drifting around, not really caring. Then i saw my dad paying for something. I wanted to surprise him. I ran up and jumped on his back
it wasn’t my dad
12. I bet her parents thought it was adorable.
I was singing and dancing at a restaurant . I thought my family was the only one there and when the song stopped I heard clapping. Apparently there was another family in the restaurant.
I hid behind my mom and cried. I was 5
11. That is truly horrifying.
So, I was like 7, and I was sitting in class taking a spelling test. We had just come back from lunch, and my stomach was feeling weird. Everything was silent, and then I felt this overwhelming heat burning in my buttcheeks.
I tried so hard to hold it in, and was literally SWEATING…. But it was too much. I couldn’t hold on any longer. I hoped nobody would hear it, and so I released it.
The room filled with a loud sound like a motorcycle had come zooming out of my anus. The stench of death exploded from within me.
The swat team came in wearing hazmat suits and handed out gas masks. And then I was sent home early because I had sharted myself.
10. I wonder if they ate them.
The church I used to go to offered doughnut holes after service, and there was a specific flavor I liked (cinnamon sugar). I usually grabbed a few of those as my family left, and I happened to see a plate full of the kind I liked. So, naturally, I grabbed some off of that plate for convenience…
and that was when I realized that plate belonged to someone. Who was standing right there. Watching me. I quickly shoved all the doughnut holes back onto their plate and walked away as fast as I could.
9. Don’t be like Bob.
I was in third grade In the center row of desks, right on the end. My teacher called up the row behind me to get their stuff, so they were lining up right next to me. My arm kind of hurt so I stretched it out to the side, and a boy walked right into it. (I’m sure you can guess the area that my hand was…)
So he and his friends (lets call the boy bob) went and told the teacher. I was like “OMG, please Bob, don’t tell the teacher!” He ignored me and went and told her. And she called me up, and was like, “what happened blah blah blah…” So I was a hot mess. I was in tears trying to explain it to her. And then Bob was like, “well if it was an accident, why didn’t you want me to tell the teacher?” I was like, “well I didn’t want to get into trouble over nothing!”
Well, long story short, I had to talk to the assistant principal, and she called me and Bob in there and then basically went over the same things that my teacher had. They literally called my parents and told them what happened and a got into tons of trouble from the school, but my parents didn’t really care.
I mean, we discussed it, but I wasn’t in trouble because I WAS A FREAKING THIRD GRADER!!! Like why would I do that on purpose???
8. I guess he couldn’t really hear.
It happened a couple months before lockdown in MI so I was 11 years old. I was at a friend’s house with her, two other friends, and I. We played hide and seek. The friend who was it laid face down on the floor, one friend scrambled upstairs, and me and the girl who lived there decided to hide in a cabinet in the basement bathroom.
Well, her grandpa was living at their house, and oblivious to us in the cabinet, he came into the bathroom and starting peeing. My friend and I were giggling like crazy. Thankfully he never found us.
7. A whole pile of terrible.
When I was in high school, I was preparing for a school play. It was about 45 minute before curtain. Keep in mind this was before cell phones.
One of the other kids in the play wasn’t there yet, so I was drafted to call his house.
I left a message on the family answering machine that haunts me to this day: “if you aren’t here before curtain, you’re dead meat.” What none of us knew was that his family was at the hospital, with his body. He had been shot a couple of hours earlier, and had passed away. In the age before cell phones and social media, there was no way for any of us to know.
I was a kid, and the message I left on that machine haunts me to this day. I went to his family’s house the next day, along with the rest of my castmates, to express sympathy, because we were all friends (although some of my castmates were FAR closer to the kid than I was).
That was the worst moment, the hardest moment. I think someone deleted the message before his parents heard it, but they heard about it, and I apologized to them. None of us had any idea. It was so hard. 🙁
6. Obviously she never can again.
My best friend lives in Colorado and I live in California ok? Well when I was 9 or 10, her family came to Legoland with us and I was SO excited. We were in line for a water ride and I was so happy I just HAD to do something about it.
So I leaned over and kissed my younger brother, only to realize that the kid wasn’t my brother. It was my friend’s brother. And everybody stared. I haven’t talked to him ever since.
5. Little kids are so gross.
Mine is the typical toddler story. When I was about 1 or 1 and a half, I thought that I could use the toilet by myself. (Keep in mind I was one, I was still in diapers ) I knew that only big girls and boys used the potty, so I wanted to try.
Guess what happened next… I sat on the toilet, but my little toddler body fell right through into the water. To make it worse, my brother hadn’t flushed… I landed in the pee, and started to scream my head off.
You should have seen my Dad’s face….
4. He’ll never live it down.
I was about 9, and there was a small creek in our neighborhood. This was where all the kids played. There had been a good rainfall and the creek was up. A group of us kids were there fishing for crayfish.
I lost my footing and slid down into the water. I was screaming for help because: 1) The water level was almost to my shoulders 2) I couldn’t swim 3) There was a current and 4) I knew there were Water Moccasin snakes in the creek. Water Moccasins aka Cottonmouths are a venomous snake.
They were all just laughing at me. Finally they pulled me out. They teased me for months about it because I had been crying like a baby
3. No, never again.
one time when i was eating at cicis pizza i started to throw up and my mom had to rush me to the toilets leaving a trail of puke..
i cant show my face there again cause the same employees work there
2. Why is it always the Vaseline?
When I was about 2 or 3 my mom realized it was quiet in the house and went to go look for me. She found me in the bathroom, standing on the toilet, covered in Vaseline. There was one of the big containers of Vaseline in there and my little brain decided it would be a good idea to smear Vaseline on myself!
I burst out into laughter when she saw me. My mom kept trying to put me in the bath but couldn’t lift me up easily because I kept sliding out of her hands.
The bottom of the bath was covered in Vaseline and my mom had to clean it out.
1. She probably had her eyes closed the whole time.
so when I was like 2 I had this huge crush on the neighbor’s boy. so to tell him of my undying love I sang him a song.
It was the wrong house.
Man, I do not miss that feeling of being an embarrassed kid in a room full of adults.
What memory would you put on this list? Tell us about it in the comments!