Homework is the bane of many children’s existence, but most of them do try to get it turned in on time.
Sometimes that doesn’t happen, and they’re faced with the question of do they take the zero, or do they give an excuse and hope for the best.
These 15 kids went with the latter, and had mixed results.
15. She didn’t quite think that through.
Not a teacher, but one of my classmates said that their dog ate their homework…
- she has a cat
- the homework was online…
14. Someone’s mom orders a lot from Amazon.
“I sent it by one of the major express companies, and they told me that the package had been opened and emptied.
They checked their security cameras at their hub center, and found nothing.
They are just as baffled as I am.”
13. No one stuck up for him.
Not a teacher here, but one of my classmates said that another classmate ate his Math homework.
The sad part was, it was no excuse. It was the truth. I saw it with my own eyes. But the teacher obviously didn’t believe him.
12. Honesty is not always the best policy.
I get kids who tell me they were cutting class/came late/slept through/talked through directions so they didn’t hear the assignment/know how to do it so they don’t have to do it.
11. A dangerous time of year for grandmas.
This country has a couple long weekends, but the students want to get a couple more days off on top of it. so on like Tuesdays and Wednesdays before the holiday i start getting messages about people’s dead grandmothers.
It’s never the grandfather. how many f*cking grannies are dying out there?
I am gonna starting asking for a picture of the body.
10. Bad day or bad teacher? You decide.
Not a teacher, and I actually finished my homework. I was in 4th grade, and we were doing a “spring cleaning”, and emptying our binders of anything from the previous unit. I guess I was being too slow, because my teacher just grabbed my binder, and shook all of its contents out into the garbage… Including my homework.
I told my mom what happened, and she told me to just be up front about it, and to not worry. The next day I went up to my teacher (instead of collecting our work, she would have us bring it to her), and the conversation went something like this:
“Where’s your homework?”
“You threw it out-”
“I threw it out?!”
She didn’t speak to me after that.
9. Hopefully she’s better at reading expressions than making up excuses.
“I broke my back.”
As she walked towards my desk. I believe she was going to give a different excuse or at least mention a different body part but the panic overwhelmed her and she went with her back.
Both sadly and hilariously I couldn’t help but give her a “are you dumb?” face.
8. Nothing truly new under the sun.
The new version of this is just uploading a blank document to the online drop box and playing dumb.
Gee, professor, I’m not sure why that’s blank. How weird! Isn’t that weird? Well, here is my paper two days after the due date…
7. Yes it does “appear to be.”
Not a teacher but one of my classmates tried:
“I was mugged on the way to school and they took my bag with all my homework in it.”
“What’s that on your shoulder?”
“….. It appears to be my bag, sir.”
6. Sass Level: 100.
This is a little off topic but the question reminded me of this. Back in 2nd grade in the mid 80s for me, I had a mean teacher. One time I didn’t do my homework. She asked why and I told her I didn’t feel like doing it because I had a headache from listening her talk all day.
She gave me a paddling, which was the norm back then. She then asked me if I was going to start doing my homework.
I told her no because my butt hurts now. I’m going to have to tend to that when I get home instead of doing homework. It was worth it because it made the class laugh.
5. You can’t say poop in an excuse.
This is legit and too ridiculous to be a lie (This was from a parent at the Catholic high school where I taught at the time.)
(paraphrasing because I can’t find the original which I kept) “Please excuse the late homework. Our pet cat defecated on it.”
And yes, defecated was the word they used.
4. Did they think she wouldn’t notice?
I taught math and science to a grade 7 class last year. The work a student handed in was not in their own handwriting so I called the parents.
The dad admitted to doing the work for him because “my sons going to be in the NHL, he doesn’t need to do math and science in grade 7”. This kid wasn’t even the best player on his rep team.
3. It’s probably because they are usually lying.
My mom is a teacher. Student’s dog peed on her hw. She put it in a bag and zipped the bag closed and brought the peed on paper in to show she wasn’t lying.
It’s sad the lengths students feel they have to go to be believed. Mom told all classes after that to just tell her what happened and redo the assignment.
2. A really terrible one.
A student told me she had a bad dream about her cousin taking her and her dog on a road trip in a Ferrari? I never quite understood how having a dream about a Ferrari road trip made someone not be able to complete work.
1. That’s a new one.
During the final I game to my English students at Vermilion Community College in 1994 (Ely, MN), a student showed up30 mins late for the final, huffing and with camos splattered in blood.
“Mr X., I just got my buck about a mile from campus and it’s out there freshly dressed but not safe. Can I retake the…’
‘Go, go’ I replied. ‘Congratz. Meat waits for no man, but a final exam, devoid of blood and viscera, will be waiting for you. Bring me some meat!’
And off he went among a smattering of laughter, and I got a few pounds of ground venison which were delicious.
Teaching is such a hard job; I imagine most days, these excuses are a source of hilarity and optimism.
If you’re a teacher, could you confirm/deny in the comments? Thanks!