Kids really do say the darndest things, but before the internet, we had no way of knowing whether our child was the only devil in town or if it was relatively normal for our young children to make us sleep with one eye open.
Now there are Twitter users like Mikki Kendall (@Karnythia), who encourage their followers to relate the creepiest thing a kid has ever said to them – and get so many replies – so we can all be equally horrified.
People who interact with kids, what is the single weirdest/creepiest thing a kid has ever said to you? It's Saturday night so why not creep yourself out? pic.twitter.com/6pK92nOkmG
— ❄Mikki Kendall❄ (@Karnythia) January 28, 2018
It’s only fair, don’t you think?
16. They just seem to…know things.
If only everything they knew was this amazing.
Not creepy but… waiting for a phone call to tell me how many days/weeks my mother had left after months with terminal cancer diagnosis… my 3 yr old (not knowing diagnosis or about expected phone call) insists repeatedly “Nana is ok now”. Get call, cancer is gone. 😯
— Kristi (@AverageRunnerK) January 28, 2018
15. This isn’t one of the most overtly horrifying ones.
But man, it definitely sent chills down my spine.
When my son was 3, he started singing a Polish nursery rhyme that my husband’s grandmother used to sing to all the babies in the family…she passed away before my son was born. We don’t speak, or sing, Polish.
— Alison Skap (@AlisonsBookMrks) January 28, 2018
14. Sort of sweet and comforting.
Maybe pick up some sage just in case, though.
When my daughter was 2 I found her under the table with one of my husband’s old children’s books, turning pages as if she were being read to. I asked her what she was doing. She said “reading with Grandma” my husband’s mother died two years before she was born. It was her book.
— Michelle B. Young 💛🐝 (@MichelleBYoung1) January 28, 2018
13. Wow. That is really something.
I hope they did some research? I need a followup!
And this 5yo old little psycho gave her turn by turn directions for close to 45 minutes. We ended up 4-5 towns away at a dead end street with an abandoned blue house.
— phenetiks (@phenetiks) January 28, 2018
12. “His heart is sore, too.”
I’m crying, y’all.
My dad died a day after his bday. So on his bday we were all sitting n sad. My niece (4yrs) walk to my mom n said “grandpa is here n says don’t cry, his heart is sore too”👀. She never met him. Mom asked how does he look, she said “like Aunty Mapule”. Yes, I’m a copy of my dad.
— Amour’s Mom💕 (@Mypule_) January 28, 2018
11. Yep, time to go.
But maybe get the name on the mausoleum first, for research?
Walking with my 2-yo in a cemetery by our house. She says “mommy, who is that man in the red jacket by the stone house?” She pointed to a mausoleum. There was no one else in the cemetery. “He’s waving at me!” She waved back. “He’s coming over to talk!”
— Kate, But Now 100% 2020er (@Ardeospina) January 28, 2018
10. Did she seem sad, or…?
That would have been a long 12 hours.
“We’re all gonna die.”
“I know sweetie. That’s just part of-”
“You’re gonna die tomorrow.”
— Millennial Pink Starburst (@ms_chel_ayyye) January 28, 2018
9. I bet she says that to all the mommies.
But seriously, so many kids who talk about their other lives.
My daughter was about 5 when she says you’re the best mommy I ever had. I said I’m the only mommy you’ve ever had. She looks at me and says no your the 3rd one but I like you the best😳
— Blockaflockoflames🖤✊🏾🖤 (@daahlingnikki) January 28, 2018
8. Time to do a cleanse.
Or just have a chat with “guy.”
On several occasions by son referred to the “guy” in our old house (“he’s big like daddy, but it’s not daddy”) He’d tell me guy was standing in the dark hallway. After no talk of it for several months, one day he suddenly looked up at the ceiling & whispered “guy is back.”
— Kyrie McCauley (@kyriemccauley) January 28, 2018
7. He seems too old to say random things.
I would have been asking some followups…once we were out of the woods and around other people.
I was hiking alone in the woods with my son who was 7. It was eerie quiet. Out of nowhere he says “The woods demand a sacrifice.”
— YOUNG MT (@MXTracy66) January 28, 2018
6. She was the first one to know.
Was she right about the sisters, though?
They would be born. She pointed to Nov. 28 on the calendar. Sure enough they were born Nov 28, 2012.
— J.A. Baum (@random_pirate27) January 28, 2018
5. How do you explain that?
I wonder if she told her brother…
1991. Worked at pediatricians office. Screening a 5y/o for therapy. He lived in the country, no friends, homeschooled, parents had no TV. Mid screen- he looks at me, says “Your brother saved my life in Desert Storm.” I went cold & pale… my brother was in Iraq
— Cricket (@cricket_71) January 28, 2018
4. Time for a trip to the library.
Because I would absolutely need to know and also have you read Wait Till Helen Comes?
…and said, “I died in there.”
— Beth (@bethatmama) January 29, 2018
3. Maybe she says that to all the girls…
But maybe she doesn’t.
I was was watching a prek class while the teacher was out and this little girl walked up to my belly pointed and said “There’s a little tiny baby in there. There’s a little baby right there.” I was pregnant but hadn’t told my job.
— Sue Ivy Carter (@KitaMargarita) January 28, 2018
2. Sometimes they just know what they need.
It’s creepy, but also helpful.
Ignored the fact that I was crying, held the kaleidoscope up to me eye and said ‘look, isn’t it beautiful!’ It was. She skipped off. Suddenly everything looked full of colours instead of the blackness that had been consuming me. She knew exactly what I needed.
— Sam (@sej199) January 28, 2018
1. I love cicadas and this is a great way to describe them.
They sound like summer.
Not creepy…kind of weird and beautiful. I taught a group of kids that included a little girl who was deaf and received an implant. She loved telling me all the new sounds she discovered. My favorite was that she thought cicadas were the sound the sun made until she saw one.
— Leslie J. Anderson (@inkhat) January 28, 2018
I am legit terrified and am just waiting for the first time my kid says something like this to me.
What would you add to this list? Scare us in the comments!