There is never enough parenting content on the internet, because let’s be honest – knowing we’re not alone is one of the best ways to get through the days and weeks, months and years.
Whether we’re celebrating milestones, wondering how many times a 3-year-old can say “mommy LOOK!” in a single day, or finding people who can prop you up until bedtime, only other parents get the trials and joys that happen every single day.
If you’re looking for some laughs and some solidarity today, here are 16 tweets that just might do the trick.
16. You know that’s the worst thing he could imagine, so yes.
From the mouths of babes.
4: What are they doing?
Me: They're protesting, little man.
Me: Because some people are awful and aren't nice to people with a different color of skin.
4: So those people are awful like the smell of poop?
That boy already gets it.
— A Bearer Of Dad News ✊🏾 (@HomeWithPeanut) June 11, 2020
15. Sadly, you can’t join the fun.
Not while he’s awake, anyway.
Listening to my 5 year old talk is like listening to a smaller version of that friend who’s high 24/7.
“What are walls?”
“Could a cheetah beat a whale shark?”
“What happens before you’re born?”
Just add James Franco and dick jokes and I’m in a Seth Rogen movie
— Arianna Bradford (@TheNYAMProject) June 6, 2020
14. I’m lucky if my almost-four-year-old will eat a grand total of 5 items on any given day.
And eating it yesterday or the day before has no bearing on whether or not he will eat it today.
At my daughter’s 4-year checkup, the doctor said she should be eating a varied diet and to make sure she’s eating a good amount from each food group and I think she said a bit about trying new foods but not sure cause I got distracted wondering if she’d ever actually met a 4yo.
— Snarky Mommy (@SnarkyMommy78) June 11, 2020
13. I honestly don’t know if that’s a fair trade-off.
Unless he also found all of the spoons missing from the kitchen.
Good news: My son cleaned his room
Bad news: He found his harmonica
— Robert Knop (@FatherWithTwins) June 9, 2020
12. RIP, kid.
He’s about to learn where the line is when speaking to Mom.
Thoughts and prayers for my son who thought it would be funny to tell me “I’ll get to it when I get to it, woman”
— Mom On The Rocks (@mom_ontherocks) June 10, 2020
11. Was it…at least scented paint?
I was really hoping that part got better.
Never thought I’d need to say ‘don’t lick the paint’ to a 14 year old, yet here we are.
— bacon popsicle 🚀 (@Gupton68) June 12, 2020
10. I mean let’s just wait and see what happens.
She’ll figure it out one way or another.
My 4yo (Button) has a fluid understanding of human development. She knows that she is growing up & getting bigger, and like any kid, wants to know if she’ll be a grownup when she’s 12.
But she also thinks she’s Benjamin Button and believes she will also get smaller in old age 😂
— Justice for #BreonnaTaylor (@TrulyTafakari) June 9, 2020
9. This is so good and pure.
Bless his heart.
We’ve been getting a meal kit service and 9yo has been gamely trying all of it, but the other day it was salmon, which I knew he’d never eat, so I made him chicken fingers from frozen instead. He was like “WOW, is this hello fresh? This is INCREDIBLE.”
— Anne Thériault (@anne_theriault) June 11, 2020
8. There are some things we don’t talk about.
And it’s whether or not your parents are allowed to steal your food.
Kid: Where do babies come from?
Me: I’ll tell you when you’re older.
Kid: What happened to the rest of my fries?
Me: When a man and a woman…
— Jessie (@mommajessiec) June 8, 2020
7. It can certainly feel that way, right?
My own parents never had this concern, I promise you.
The kids report cards are coming out today so I'm excited to see how I did.
— Rodney Lacroix (@RodLacroix) June 10, 2020
6. Kids really do make everything better.
Except for the things they make worse.
surgery went great! the note I woke up to is the absolute best part pic.twitter.com/SlKL44bB5U
— chrissy teigen (@chrissyteigen) June 11, 2020
5. I’ve never thought of it that way…
But no one would have accused either of my newborns of being precious angels, so.
Babies sneak into your home using your wife like a human trojan horse. Are those the actions of a "precious angel"? I think not.
— Henpecked Hal (@HenpeckedHal) June 11, 2020
4. She is not the first child to want to trade in a family member for a pet.
Let’s be honest, animals are usually easier to live with, and they don’t make you clean up your room.
[stray cat on our front porch]
6-year-old: Can we keep it?
Me: Your mom is allergic.
6: Mom can stay outside.
— James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) June 8, 2020
3. That was definitely not an innocent question.
If your child is five, just assume it’s not innocent.
My 5yo’s latest way of roasting me with a seemingly innocent question was asking if I was sure I was younger than grandpa.
— mark (@TheCatWhisprer) June 7, 2020
2. If you’re not wondering how long and how many times this might work, you don’t have a three-year-old.
Mine hides in the same place every time, so we’re a ways off.
I was folding clothes and my 3yo asked me to play hide-and-seek. I said, ok go hide. After like 15 minutes I hear a little voice yell, "mom are you gonna come find me!" I totally forgot we were playing hide-and-seek, I just kept on folding clothes lol
— Marcy G 🍕 (@BunAndLeggings) June 10, 2020
1. And then the day comes when you’re up and the baby isn’t…
That’s the day you realize you’ve become your mother/father.
Twitter: Hey you're awake early, why are–
Me: Baby's up
Me, grabbing a fresh diaper and a new package of Pampers Sensitive Wipes: Baby's up
— Kwame Mbalia (@KSekouM) June 10, 2020
I just love hearing from other parents, and the laugh is always appreciated, right?
Which was your favorite tweet of the bunch? Do you have a favorite parenting account that you follow?
Share it with us in the comments!