The majority of parents in this world are so grateful for their babies. They tried for them, they adore them, they rearrange their lives (happily) to care for them to the best of their ability.

There are some parents, though, who do not rise to the occasion, and who seem intent on taking their own children down with them as they sink.

These 19 kids are grown up now, but they can’t forget the toxic things their parents said while they were still living at home.

19. Sucks the air right out of you.

“I don’t believe you”

When the school told her I’d been sexually assaulted.

And my father said I ruined the family when the police came over to my house. I had actually forgotten I had told someone in school about it until they showed up. My father didn’t take it very well. He was embarrassed I had said something. I’m 42 now. With boys of my own and I I’m proud to say they don’t have a relationship with my dad. They don’t know him. My father in law is the best grandfather to them.

I’m so sorry this happened to you. You’re not alone. We’re probably millions who sadly went thru this.

18. What does that even mean?

One Friday when I was somewhere in the 8-10 year old range we were going shopping. We were walking towards the mall behind a group of young guys in their late teens/early 20s. They were laughing and joking, seemingly having the time of their life. It looked like a lot of fun. I pointed at them and told my mom that it reminded me of the song my dad used to play, The boys are back in town (an old Thin Lizzy song).

My mom looked straight ahead and bluntly answered “you will never experience that”. It wasn’t exactly the kind of answer I had hoped to get. All I could get out of my mouth was “…what?…”. You won’t, was her final saying on the matter.

Way to ruin a Friday evening.

17. How can anyone say this?

This actually happened to my cousin. Her father committed suicide when she was 8. From then on her mother became an alcoholic. After losing custody of her kids, she was eventually granted the ability to see her kids unsupervised which did not Pan out.

The kids spent the weekend with her but pretty soon she started drinking very heavily. My cousin told her she would have to tell another adult that she was drinking and the mom started calling her all sorts of terrible names so my cousin ran to the bathroom and locked the door behind her.

I swear to god the mom actually said to her own 15 year old daughter: when the police ask you why both your parents are dead, you’ll know what to tell them. I’m going to kill myself just like your father did and both will be your fault.

My cousin is so sweet, funny, and pretty and she’s one of my favorite people in the planet. She is so kind and she got dealt an awful hand.

16. This is so gross and awful.

Life would be better without you. You are the reason for our misery.

The good old “We can’t take responsibility for our choices, so lets take it out on you” kinds of bastards.

15. Doesn’t seem like the most solid marriage, then.

“You’re the reason why your dad and I almost divorced.”

Also “you’re always up so late! I can’t even have sex with your mother!” Screaming in my face on the school run.

Fun times.

14. It’s horrible enough.

It may not be as harsh as other things stated but the dreaded ‘It’s all in your head/you are just imagining it.”

As it turned out I wasn’t imagining it and now I struggle to differentiate what’s real and what’s not because I was led to believe I thought I was imagining things constantly.

I always need a second opinion because I think mine is invalid and I imagine things. I always feel like I am the problem in every situation.

13. I just gasped.

When I was 11 I overheard my mother telling someone that at least my looks meant she didn’t have to worry about me being molested or raped.

That messed me up for years.

12. I wonder why they talk to her at all?

I have a list.

I wish I aborted you too.

I wish I put you up for adoption.

List all the bad things about dad and then immediately tell me I look/act just like him.

What did I do to deserve such a disrespectful child why couldn’t I have a good one? (I was not a bad kid at all, always home, cleaning the house, cooking for her, good grades, people pleaser, etc.)

She wonders why I never talked to her about big things happening in my life, why I put 5,000 miles in-between us, and why I haven’t returned home for almost 10 years.

11. Seems like a bit of an overreaction.

my mum told me i deserved nothing in life because i forgot to do the dishes before she came home.

10. All humans are worthy.

You are useless.

No man would ever want to marry you.

I wish I never had you.

Gee…Thanks mom for showing me I am worth something. (SARCASM)🙅🏻‍♀️.

2 decades have gone by and it still pinches me today. The list goes on but those 3 statements were repeatedly said. I would NEVER treat my children like that. Hell, when I have kids they are not visiting their grandparents without supervision. This time I will stand up to them. I have nothing to lose this time. It’s been 20 years, better late than never.

9. Talk about a distorted view.

“You’re a useless disappointment” “Do you think you’ll ever amount to anything?” “You’re pathetic.” “You’re like a tiny little ant– I could destroy you so easily.” “I don’t deserve you. I’m too good of a parent for you.” “You’re an abuser.”

8. So offhand.

You’re going to die alone.

Even worse you’re going to end up alone but said casually in response to a comment I made about a reality show. That’s my dads specialty. Incredibly horrid comments said in a harmless tone out of nowhere.

But those comments say a lot about him and nothing about me.

7. I cannot even fathom it.

“Your uncle wouldn’t mess with you if you didn’t walk around the house like a slut”

Not told to me, but a childhood friend.

Her uncle was arrested a few years after that but the thing that hurt her the worst is that her mother assumed it was her fault.

6. That’s mature.

Threatening suicide when you try to set a boundary.

There’s other things, arguably worse, but I don‘t feel comfortable sharing them.

5. Way too many stories like this one.

When I told my grandma that dad had molested me she basically said I must have asked for it by wearing something provocative. I was 16 at the time and wore a hoodie and jeans. Needless to say I wasn’t going to get any help. I couldn’t have told anyone else anyway because: I was afraid people wouldn’t believe me and my dad told everyone I was retarded to humiliate and discredit me.

As an adult I have long since cut off all ties and connections to my dad. I’m free of him.

4. It breaks your heart a little at a time.

My boyfriend and his sister were neglected when they were in their dad’s care. They would go days without food (aside from easy things they could find like canned fruit) and nights without parental care. His dad was into drugs and partying, but for some reason he still wanted to have part custody of his kids. They were young when this went on, like 5 – 10 years old.

They never told their mom I guess because it wasn’t like that everytime they saw him. They did have memories of him teaching them how to play guitar or learning to snowboard. They looked up to him still. Fast forward 20 years, his dad never grew out of this phase of being a rebel and partier and never really progressed in life. He never celebrated holidays with them, never said happy birthday, and almost always made false promises of meeting up to see them (they lived three hours apart).

But, he would call my boyfriend crying about his problems and asking for advise every once in a while. He didn’t care much about what my boyfriend was up to or working on, but rather just blubber on about his terrible life. My boyfriend told his dad that he was tired of feeling like the parent in the relationship and told him to get his stuff together and stop asking him to solve his problems for him because he’s the kid and his dad is the parent.

My boyfriend cut him off of communication in hopes that it would be motivation for his dad to get it together. His dad committed suicide a few months later.

3. Bitter is one word for it.

My mom likes to remind me every so often that my dad never wanted kids, and he told her that if she wanted them she would have to quit working and stay home to raise them. So two-in-one: my dad didn’t actually want me, and I ruined the career my mom loved.

What pisses me off more is she didn’t start telling me this until after my dad developed early-onset dementia, so he couldn’t even back up or refute the claims. Just her bitter word.

2. It cuts like a knife.

I wish you were the one who died not your father.

Some people just don’t think how a single sentence could haunt their kid forever.

1. This is downright heartbreaking.

“I’m tired of pretending to love you.”

Wow. Some people just do not deserve the love of their kids.

What horrible statements have you survived? Get them off your chest in the comments!