Gone are the days when you and your husband could rip off your clothes and get busy whenever one (or both) of you had lunchtime hankering, and you can forget devouring each other instead of breakfast in bed on a Saturday morning – you have kids now!

And while having kids is undeniably wonderful, the sad truth is that finding the time and energy to maintain an intimate relationship with your partner can be challenging, at best.

That said, there are some good parts – like these 7 unexpected ways your hubby or partner turns you on now without even trying.

#7. They ask about your day.

Yes, you were just home with the kids all day. Also – they’re both of your kids, so shouldn’t they want to hear about the cute thing the baby did at the library, or all of the ways your toddler tested your patience? Well…if they want to get you randy, they’ll at least pretend to!

#6. When they feed the kids – and you.

One of the most jarring realizations of adulthood is realizing that you have to feed yourself 3 meals a day. That goes double (or more) when you become a parent and realize you’ve got to do the same for little people for the next couple of decades, too.

So, when you come home to a cooked meal and the kids are seated at the table? Hubba hubba.

#5. When they play with the kids.

You’ve done it all day, and even though you adore your littles (of course) it’s nice to sit back and watch. Bonus? Watching your partner bond with your littles and make them giggle goes straight to your heart.

#4. They plan a date night.

Bonus points if it’s more creative than dinner and a movie – something that reminds you how well you know each other and how much fun the two of you were able to have when you were on your own.

#3. They check in about your relationship.

Relationships don’t stay great on their own – if you know people with a great relationship or marriage, chances are it’s because they don’t let it fall by the wayside. That said, you shouldn’t have to be the one always starting the conversation, and when he does, it reminds you why you want things to work in the first place.

#2. They give you a break.

Whether it’s getting up early with the kids so you can grab a couple of extra winks or encouraging you to get out for the girls night you’ve been putting off, your partner realizing how much you do and how much you might need a few hours off can really get you in the mood.

#1. They take pictures of us with the kids.

Moms aren’t in as many pictures as we’d like to be, looking back, because we’re usually the one who thinks to grab a camera. Seeing my husband taking pictures of a candid moment really melts my heart.

Let them in on the secrets – maybe they’ll do it even more!