If there’s one thing that’s totally true about parenting, it’s that it gives you lots of material. Kids are hilarious, both when they’re trying to be and when they’re not, which is good – we might not survive otherwise.
Here are 15 parents who are really getting their little one’s best efforts (for now).
15. Best to be honest about these things from the start.
No need to be impractical.
3-year-old: mama why do people get married?
Me: well, when two people love each other very much it can be a good thing to do for tax purposes.
— Felicia Day (@feliciaday) July 1, 2020
14. Better safe than sorry.
But yes, let us all have that confidence.
Self-confidence is my four year old asking me to turn off the ceiling fan so he can show me how high he jumps.
— Henpecked Hal (@HenpeckedHal) July 1, 2020
13. And they realize they’ve always known
They just didn’t understand until then.
A dark day for parents is when their child learns what "hypocrite" means.
— Rodney Lacroix (@RodLacroix) June 29, 2020
12. And yet everyone wants to go to the beach?
It’s really not the best with little kids.
Let’s get married and have kids so instead of relaxing on the beach you can keep sand out of their mouth while I blow up a raft and they ask if there is a pool.
— Simon Holland (@simoncholland) July 1, 2020
11. It’s how she expresses herself, okay?
As long as there was no Sharpie on the walls or furniture, I’d call that a win.
I was celebrating the fact my kids were all playing together nicely.
Turns out my 8yo opened a Sharpie “tattoo shop” in his bedroom.
My 2yo has “tattoo” barbed wire across her chest and a skull with DEADLOCK scrolled down her arm.
— Unfiltered Mama (@UnfilteredMama) July 1, 2020
10. This girl is going places.
Watch out, everyone.
Walking at nine months. Scamming at ten months. Our baby girl 😍 (📷: @postracialist) pic.twitter.com/xJcRqvU0Jf
— Decker Ngongang (@Ngongang) July 1, 2020
9. So much for beggars not being choosers.
That lesson doesn’t apply to fairy tale creatures, perhaps.
My son lost his tooth yesterday and I go to his room last night to grab the tooth in exchange for some $$$… And this is the message he wrote… 😒😒😒 with full on instructions 🤦🏾♂️🙄🤣 pic.twitter.com/jiMm5y9UF9
— Chef Lauren (@ChefLaurenW) July 2, 2020
8. The most terrifying thing anyone could imagine.
Anyone who has stepped on one before, anyway.
Good luck robbing my house. My home security system is LEGOs on the floor.
— Jessie (@mommajessiec) June 29, 2020
7. They could be fined otherwise.
“What’s in here, a ton of bricks?” is an acceptable substitute.
By law, all dads who pick up a packed suitcase to load into the car have to say, “Jeez, what did you put in here, a dead body?”
— SpacedMom (@copymama) June 27, 2020
6. That is a…moment.
Not good, not bad, but certainly a moment.
my daughter threw a tantrum because she felt it was too early to be spoken to and it really is a miracle that we create little versions of ourselves
— That Mom Tho (@mom_tho) July 2, 2020
5. Why do I feel like there must be meaning in this somewhere?
Probably because I haven’t have a second cup of coffee.
My 4-year-old wanted to use talk-to-text to send a message to his aunt. This is what was sent. My 4-year-old is THE world's worst rapper. pic.twitter.com/Bq15aRcH1a
— A Bearer Of Dad News ✊🏾 (@HomeWithPeanut) July 2, 2020
4. Unless you’re one of those cry-it-out people.
No judgement but you won’t learn yoga that way.
Forget taking a yoga class. Once you’ve taken 30 minutes to exit a baby’s room in slow motion, you’ll know every position well enough to teach a yoga class.
— The ParentNormal (@ParentNormal) June 28, 2020
3. She learned from watching you.
Isn’t it sweet? HAHAHA.
Me, to 8y.o: “Why do you watch YouTube videos of other people playing video games when you could play them yourself?”
8: “Well, why do YOU watch TikTok videos of people dancing when you could do the dances yourself?”
Well played, kid.
— Stephanie Ortiz (@Six_Pack_Mom) July 1, 2020
2. Also that terrifying moment when you make a threat you really, really don’t want to follow through on.
Taking away iPad or TV time hurts you more than them some days.
A surprising amount of parenting is bribing your kids with things you don’t want to do, then breathing a sigh of relief when they mess it up so you don’t have to deliver.
— Arianna Bradford (@TheNYAMProject) June 28, 2020
1. Things can get very honest when they’re pretending to be you.
It’s like looking in a tiny judgmental mirror.
If you want to know what you really look like hand your phone to a 5-year-old to take a picture.
— mark (@TheCatWhisprer) June 29, 2020
I’m just giggling, and this time not because my kid is walking around with a box on his head.
What’s the funniest thing your kid has done this week? Share with us in the comments!