Kids are hilarious, it’s true. Also, they will eviscerate you with burns so hot you’ll have no idea how to treat them – or what to say in response – and give no cares whatsoever.

And we still feed and clothe and house them. Because it’s illegal not to, but also because they’re cute I guess.

No one is dumping these 15 hooligans out on their butts anytime soon, anyway.

15. There was an incident.

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How is this even possible! How do I move this without spilling it everywhere ๐Ÿ˜‚ well played Cerys well played #mumlife #wellplayed #frosties #mess #prankster #daughter #assholekid #kidsaretheworst

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14. Oh my God…this is not funny.

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Anyone else ready for the Halloween spirit to be over? #notarealbug #kidpranks

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13. I mean…just sigh.

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Because you know… #myminime #sarcastickid #yesmy5yroldtexts

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12. When they technically follow directions, but you still want to kill them.

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What I said was "Get your clothes off the floor." What my 6 year old son heard was "Throw your clothes on the fan to get them off the floor." Clearly I need to be more specific with my instructions. #parentingishard #momofboys #outsmartedbymykids

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11. My mother would lose it.

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AFTER I beg him time and time again, "Don't mix the colors!!" He comes up to me like "mom! Look at what I do!" ๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ–•๐Ÿฝ I swear to GAWD! My kids are trying to kill me by way of OCD! #MyKidsAnAsshole #OhTheHumanity! #TheyNeverListen #MommyHasIssues #PlayDoh #PlayDohDont

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10. A little smartass in the making. I approve.

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I asked for a cup of water and a straw. Igot a "cup" of water and a straw. #mykidthinkshesfunny

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9. Mom, we need to talk.

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I always get such great cards..this one from @rubycyn is this year's Best in Show #funnycards #aintitthetruth #sarcastickids

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8. Hopefully, someone carries a pocket knife.

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When you realize your 21 year old has grown into the smart ass you always hoped he would… โ€ข โ€ข โ€ข #christmas #ducttapeforthewin #smartasskid #appledoesntfallfarfromthetree

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7. Here’s hoping sister finds it first.

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Anyone else's kid an asshole like mine? He hid this keychain in my bananas n i almost died going for a snack!! #mykidisanasshole #banana #spider #thankskid #mildheartattack

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6. A bold move from someone who still gets money from their parents.

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Thanks, Chloe! Such a wisenheimer. #daughtergoals #sarcastickid

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5. That’s one thing to do when you’re bored, I guess.

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#my8yearoldhasjokes #meankid #ipad #kotex #lordhelpme #myson

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4. Those aren’t the emojis you want to see.

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๐Ÿ˜’My son doesnโ€™t really want my airplane to crash and burn๐Ÿ™๐Ÿพ #ohlord #militarylife #sarcastickids #takeoffandlanding #whatanass #prayforme #boymomlife #helovesme #helovesmenot #hewisheshewashere #crazykids #thatmomlifetho

A post shared by ๐šƒ๐š›๐š’๐š—๐š’๐šœ๐š‘๐šŠ ๐™ฟ๐šŠ๐šก๐š๐š˜๐š— (@trinisha.paxton) on

3. It kind of makes you feel loved and watched all at once.

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Annistonโ€™s idea of a prank. #adorable #kidpranks #annistonmarienicole

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2. There is no escape.

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For the love of god, I just want to wipe my ass! #playdate #sleepover #sleepover #sleepovergoals #wtfkid #kids #pranks #kidpranks

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1. No more Star Wars for you.

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#hemakesmelaugheveryday #proudmama #sarcastickid

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Kids really are about the best thing to get you through the rough days. Unless they’re causing the rough days.

It’s a toss-up.

What’s the funniest/meanest thing your kid ever said?

Share it with us in the comments!