Ah, bedtime. It’s the bane of many a parents’ existence, and even if you’ve got angel children who love to sleep and typically listen when you tell them to do something, they will take advantage of bedtime at one point or another.
It’s in their DNA; they can’t help it.
That said, these 15 parents have had it up to here, mister, so it’s time to go to bed.
15. That sounds about right.
And sort of like a good idea.
If I insisted on getting my kids to bed by 7:00 every night, I'd have to start their bedtime routine just after breakfast.
— Dave Lesser (@AmateurIdiot) May 22, 2016
14. They will win that game.
It was a good idea, though.
The game show Let's Make A Deal,
but me bribing my kids to stay in bed.
— Marl (@Marlebean) May 2, 2016
13. You can do this.
Now get back in there.
Me: Alright, there’s no more crying during the bedtime routine.
— Jessie (@mommajessiec) May 8, 2020
12. Rookie mistake.
They’ll outgrow that when they outgrown stuffed animals sorry.
Warning to parents:
If you decide to do something special at bedtime, be prepared for it to become part of the bedtime routine for the next three to five years.
This mom, who is currently "brushing" seventeen stuffed animals' teeth.
— Scary Mommy (@ScaryMommy) June 27, 2020
11. Just read your book.
And don’t tell your mother.
Me: It's bedtime
4: Read one more book
Me: You're stalling
4: Whats stalling?
Me: When you try to not go to bed
4: Let's talk about stalling
— The Alex Nevil (@TheAlexNevil) July 24, 2013
10. Go ahead and shake your fist at the sun.
It doesn’t care, though.
parenting makes you do weird things like hate the daylight for waking your kids and preventing them from going to bed
— That Mom Tho (@mom_tho) May 21, 2020
9. I mean will she put him to bed?
Because that changes my opinion on her.
during bedtime the toddler announced there is a second "purple mommy" who appears at night someone help pls help
— Chantal Braganza (@chantalbraganza) January 7, 2019
8. One of them definitely knows where it is.
You’re not waking them up, though.
Getting the kids to bed after a long day and then not being able to find the TV remote is like, "Good effort, but no gold stars today."
— Ash (an female) ⚪️ (@adult_mom) April 22, 2016
7. Let his imagination run wild.
Maybe it will put him to sleep.
In his bedtime prayers my 4 y/o asked for a toy I secretly threw away two weeks ago. Not gonna say anything because who am I to limit God.
— Bunmi Laditan (@HonestToddler) January 3, 2018
6. Eventually you’ll get to acceptance.
They’ll wear you down.
My bedtime routine with the kids is just cycling through the Kubler-Ross stages of grief.
— Amy Dillon (@amydillon) July 15, 2015
5. They can do SO many things at once.
It’s like they’ve been training for bedtime all day.
me: it's bedtime
kids: ok hold on we have to build a house, write a book, perform surgery, travel for business, can you cut my nails and also [projectile vomitting]
— Dadman Walking (@dadmann_walking) January 16, 2020
4. That’s excellent parenting right there.
Any song will do, so pick a good one.
“Mama, one more lullaby?”
“I can’t think of any more- GOODNIGHT!”
“Tommy used to work on the docks… Union’s been on strike, he’s down on his luck, it’s tough..”
— RachRiot (@RachRiot) September 12, 2018
3. Definitely choose something boring.
A textbook, perhaps.
If you run out of bedtime stories to tell your kids, don't improvise and read them the "It: Chapter 2" synopsis off IMDb
— Conan O'Brien (@ConanOBrien) September 15, 2019
2. That’s called karma, people.
I would be giggling for hours.
Since my husband is the “fun” parent, the kids want him to handle everything, including meals and bedtime.
He’s annoyed, or at least I think that’s what he said. I couldn’t hear him over my triumphant laughter echoing off the walls.
— Arianna Bradford (@TheNYAMProject) November 2, 2019
1. This is actually a really good question.
Now go to sleep.
Important bedtime question from my 6-year-old…
In the underworld, how do you tell which skeleton is which? Do they have skeleton hair?
— Andrew Knott (@aknott21) July 29, 2020
I want bedtime to be lovely, but it’s just not.
If you’ve got tips for making it easier, leave them in the comments!