It’s been a rough several months for parents, and we were all honestly hoping that the end of the summer would spell relief.
Let’s not go back and tell these 15 parents that there’s not really a light at the end of the tunnel, because I’m not sure they’ll be okay if we do.
15. You have to take advantage of the lying while they’re little.
Someday they will be able to tell time, too.
"Sorry I don't make the rules" I say blatantly lying to my child about a rule I just made up.
— Avocado Mama (@HeatherStenwall) July 2, 2020
14. If you are excited about something, they will ruin it.
That’s the rules.
I'll never forget that on this day, 2 years ago, I tried to be spontaneous and took my kids to see a sunflower field… pic.twitter.com/RyQ7hmFW8W
— jnyemb (@jnyemb) July 14, 2020
13. It’s definitely scary.
But there’s more avoiding people.
Me: *Walking into grocery store with kids*. Buddy, you need to put on your mask. Coronavirus rules.
4: *Proudly puts on his skull and crossbones mask* Mommy, does the Corona Birus mean it’s Halloween all the time now?
Me: You’re not wrong, buddy.
— Goldfish and Chicken Nuggets (@gfishandnuggets) July 16, 2020
12. May we all aspire to such a thing.
I would kill for that kind of confidence.
Self-confidence is my four year old asking me to turn off the ceiling fan so he can show me how high he jumps.
— Henpecked Hal (@HenpeckedHal) July 1, 2020
11. We definitely all know how she feels.
So leave her alone, lady!
my daughter threw a tantrum because she felt it was too early to be spoken to and it really is a miracle that we create little versions of ourselves
— That Mom Tho (@mom_tho) July 2, 2020
10. And somehow, it’s full of twice as much liquid as it should be.
Toddlers are basically sorcerers.
Optimists see the cup half-full.
Pessimists see the cup half-empty.
Parents of toddlers see the cup spilled all over the floor.
— A Bearer Of Dad News ✊🏾 (@HomeWithPeanut) July 9, 2020
9. Your favorite child could change depending on the day.
Same goes for your least favorite child.
Me: We're blessed with 2 wonderful children
Wife: We have 3 children
Me: *glaring at Keith*
— Pessimus Prime (@BigJDubz) July 30, 2020
8. Tomorrow you will be the Worst Mom Ever.
They like to keep you in check.
My 4 year old just got mad at me for not calling myself the Best Mom in the World, so if you’re looking for a life coach who’ll scream at you until you believe in yourself, have I got a recommendation for you.
— Arianna Bradford (@TheNYAMProject) July 9, 2020
7. Ah, raising teens.
Not a one of us is prepared.
Pleased to announce that if my daughter starts applying her makeup now, she’ll be ready to join us on our vacation by the time we get back from it next week.
— bacon popsicle 🤚 (@Gupton68) July 31, 2020
6. At least someone else is entertained.
Take solace in that.
2: you don't have a penis
Me: no baby I don't
2: *screaming* I HAVE A PENIS
Me: that's true
2: MOMMY, YOU HAVE SO MUCH HAIR!!!
Neighboring stall: *giggles*
Long story short, I can never leave this bathroom
— Not Another Pinterest Mom (@snarkymomtobe) July 9, 2020
5. He will know if you do it wrong, too.
Even if it’s just one little piece.
Look, I dropped my 8yo’s Lego plane and had to put it back together exactly how he made it so don’t tell me I don’t know what stress feels like
— MumInBits (@MumInBits) July 9, 2020
4. A truer statement has never been uttered.
I’m just relieved I like my own kids, honestly.
Sure your own kids are annoying, but have you ever met other people’s kids?
— WTFDAD (@daddydoubts) July 4, 2020
3. It’s like college all over again.
Those dang sorority girls.
6-year-old: I'm throwing a party in my room!
Me: Awesome! I'll be right up.
6: Sorry. We're full.
— James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) July 6, 2020
2. They’re adorable, aren’t they?
At least they’re funny sometimes.
My kid shouts, farting while skating
— Marl (@Marlebean) July 2, 2020
1. That is terrifying.
Where is the brain bleach?!
My son has a Thomas the Train bed and now I’ll never sleep again pic.twitter.com/ilvjY4LERs
— Nathan Thomas (@isosmrt) July 18, 2020
I can so relate, how about you?
Tell us your tips and tricks for surviving at home – we all need some more!