Our parents are supposed to be our biggest supports in our lives. They’re the ones who teach us the ways of the world, who are there for us when we trip and fall, and who love us no matter what we’ve done wrong or right.

Sadly, way too many parents don’t take this job seriously enough, and it’s not long before their kids realize the people they want to idolize don’t deserve it at all.

If you’re someone who hasn’t been able to respect and rely on your parents, you’re not alone – these 16 people are sharing the moment when that happened to them.

16. Just no effort.

When I became a parent and realized they were barely there for me. I feel like they did the bare minimum. I have this overwhelming urge and responsibility to give my daughter the best life possible.

To be there for her and protect her and guide her… I guess my parents just didn’t feel that way about me. It hurts.

15. What on earth.

My parents calling me, a few weeks after I had given birth, to tell me that I needed to lose weight.

It made me feel like I looked disgusting. I went to the psychologist, cause I really thought the problem was with me, but she made me realize that my family, inlaws and boyfriend had some really toxic behaviour.

14. Dad was the problem.

My parents split when I was young (like 3ish) and I rarely saw my dad after that. But one weekend I spent with him and his new wife, I heard her crying in her room every day.

My dad was a dick to her, and I felt so bad. He’s been married like 4 or 5 different times now.

13. This is so immature.

My parents are divorced. Mom had to move in with my dad for a bit because she didn’t have a place to stay. She wouldn’t clean up after herself or her daughter (my half sister) and she took over my brothers room and would just stay locked away in there doing seemingly nothing to change her situation.

When my dad confronted her calmly about her rudeness telling her that she needs to be courteous and clean up after herself she screamed at him and cursed him out saying things like “I don’t have time to be courteous” and “You’re not my parent”.

I’ve never been so angry at another person, and although it was a stressful time for everyone she had no right to be so ungrateful. I didn’t have a whole lot of respect for my mom at this point in the first place, but that definitely made me lose any that I still had.

12. She could go on.

Oh… so many things.

Mom says she doesn’t have favorites but there are obviously favorites.

I could be the first US woman president and still be a disappointment because I don’t want/have kids

Dad telling me I may as well hurt myself when I went on Prozac as a teenager

Mom and dad bought my twin sister a fully refinished 67 mustang on our 16th birthday. I got a 95 Corolla that would regularly turn off randomly

During the early 2010s my parents needed money. We loaned them 10k. Never got it back. The following year they gave my sister 5k to help pay for her wedding because “she’s always dreamed of being a bride”.

Mom hates dad. Refuses to recognize they should have split up a long time ago. To make sure they don’t have to actually come to terms with their marriage, they continue to let two of my sisters, their husbands, and kids live in their house. When one of those sisters decided to get a divorce (hm, wonder why… perhaps living in a house with 6 other adults doesn’t work well for a healthy marriage?), they stopped talking to that sister. Which is hard because… you know… they all still live together.

I could go on. Let’s summarize with they pretend their lives and their family is pure gold and instead we’re just as fucked up as everyone else.

11. This has to feel awful.

They put my sisters through their undergraduate degrees, but have not provided me with any finances.

I am not trying to sound like a spoiled brat, but it sucks that I am expected to be at the same place they were at when they were 24 – yet I am in student debt, not done my degree & have to pay everything on my own.

10. Not the correct response.

My entire childhood I had a hard time opening up about emotional problems and when I finally opened up about how pointless I felt my life was, there response was pretty much “oh well, that’s life”.

My girlfriend was the only one who got me not to end my life.

9. Playing favorites.

My wife is the older kid and has college debt while her brother is 30 and her parents still give him money and pay for his car.

I really don’t know why my wife doesn’t tell them that they’re being unfair but it drives me f**king crazy.

8. Definitely a lot.

When I was 3, my mom was a hairdresser. She’d put all of the change she made from tips in a piggy bank and once it filled up, she’d have it converted to cash, out the cash at the bottom, and start over. She did this to save up for me to go to school.

I just recently found out that my mom managed to save a couple thousand dollars by doing that, and one day found out the piggy bank was empty.

Turns out my dad stole all that money and spent it on god knows what. My dad also did $6000 of damage to my current house. I could go on about how sh*%ty my dad is, but it’s a lot.

7. Selective ethics.

When I found out that, despite my parents ostracising me for having The Gay, which is Sinning and means I’m Going Straight To Hell, it turns out my mum has had three affairs that we know about.

But that’s okay, because it’s hetero cheating, which apparently is just fine.

6. I mean…

32f here. My mother raised me to act like a lady and she was pretty strict about it. Two years ago she admitted that she’s seeing a married man.

Not very lady like mother!

5. Worst advice ever.

My sister was in a relationship with someone who was emotionally manipulative and wanted help with breaking up with them.

My mum said to “make it work”. we both realized we were more of an adult than her in some things that day.

4. Hard years.

My mom and I were at the gym right after marriage equality had been legalized in the United States. I was in the closet but obviously very excited and was listening in to a group of guys being excited about the law when she began to get annoyed at them.

I asked her why and she said, “I just wish everyone would stop being excited. I get it, people can get married now, but that doesn’t mean they should be gloating about it.”

She went on to say she didn’t care what “two consenting adults do behind closed doors” but that she doesn’t believe they should be able to get married and that “any real Christian wouldn’t support gay marriage.” (This coming from a woman who hadn’t attended church or prayed in years)

Bonus disappointment came a few years later when I came out to her. I brought up the conversation and she vehemently denied that is what she said or thought and that I must have misheard her. You don’t forget the words that cause that kind of pain.

On a good note, her and I are still on great speaking terms. I love her to no end, but those were hard years.

3. Priorities much?

When my dad gave me an hour long talk about missing a single homework assignment, but only a five minute talk after I attempted suicide. And what was that talk about? Half of it why I shouldn’t kill myself, half of it why I should have been doing homework.

He cares more about my education than my life.

2. I hate this as a parent.

One of my earliest memories is my mother lying to me just to get me to shut up.

I realize that all parents do this cause they need a break but because I caught it at such a young age I had trouble believing anything she said afterwards.

1. That will do it.

When my mom cheated on my dad.

I do not like these stories at all and I wish everyone had great parents. Sigh.

If you’ve got a story like these, drop it in our comments if you think it would be cathartic for you.