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17 Totally Serious Reasons That Toddlers Were Crying

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I know there is some controversy on whether or not it’s okay to post all of the silly, hilarious, or maddening reasons your little emotional teapot is crying today. It’s not nice, some say, to make fun of your kid on the internet before they are old enough to understand what that means or say it’s okay.

That said, there’s something to be said for parental solidarity, and being able to laugh with other people going through what you’re going through, and just for keeping your sanity amidst the sea of chaos that is living with kids under five.

In the spirit of connection, not of meanness, I share with you these 17 truly baffling reasons kids are having meltdowns out there.

17. And that’s how we knew she was a parseltongue.

“My sister threw a tantrum because she couldn’t climb into the snake enclosure at the zoo.

She said they looked lonely.”

16. It’s those days you have to try very hard not to chuck grapes at a child.

“My 2.5-year-old asked for five grapes. When I accidentally brought six he had a meltdown, so I took one away.

He then cried harder because I took one of his grapes.”

15. That is not feminist at all.

“My toddler had a gigantic tantrum because ants were only called ‘ants,’ and there weren’t any ‘uncles.'”

14. I mean honestly maybe there should have been.

“The 3-year-old I nanny had a tantrum because I didn’t pack his bathing suit…to go to his grandma’s funeral.

I guess since we kept saying it was a ‘celebration of Grandma’ he thought that meant there would be a pool party.”

13. She just has a lot of feelings, okay?

“I work in childcare, and today a toddler was crying hysterically in the corner.

When I asked her what was wrong, she sobbed, ‘He took my ball…and then he gave it back!”

12. Is this sweet or crazy? You decide.

“My daughter bawled because she didn’t want me to get wet — I was taking a shower.”

11. It’s an acquired skill.

“My nephew flipped because he couldn’t fake burp.”

10. It is supposed to be a sign of good luck in some cultures.

“I’m a nanny of a 3-year-old who had a meltdown — I’m talking devastated crying — because his brother’s car window had bird poop on it and his didn’t.”

9. I mean it’s probably not about the cup.

“My son had a nuclear meltdown because he wanted water in the green cup, and I gave him water in the green cup.”

8. The debate of the century.

“I teach preschool and two of my 3-year-olds got into a HEATED argument because they thought only one of them could like onions.

There was sobbing. Rage. Tears.

All over onions.”

7. Get it right, lady!

“My 3-year-old asked for ‘water, ice,’ and lost his mind when I called it ‘ice water.’

You’d think the world was ending.”

6. You need to get that girl some friends. Or some talking dolls.

“My daughter has a meltdown every time we play with her dolls because I can’t make four different voices at the same time.

She screams and cries because there’s just one doll talking and not all four.”

5. That is a long time to hold onto a wrong.

“For about a year my daughter sobbed every time we got our mail because the door to the building opened from the right and she wanted it to open from the left.”

4. I don’t even know what that means but it kind of sounds legit.

“My 2-year-old threw a fit because she couldn’t put her shirt on like pants.”

3. Let him murder your face, dangit!

“My 2-year-old had a meltdown because I wouldn’t let him put a pillow on my head and then jump on it.”

2. A tiny stockpiler in the making.

“My 2-year-old brother throws a tantrum every day because he wants us to buy more bandages.”

1. Hey, his body, his choice.

“My toddler threw a fit at the doctor’s office because we had to measure his height.

He’d done it before just fine, but this time it resulted in a full nuclear meltdown. It took three of us to get his height.

The shots, though? Those were OK. He just quietly sat still and let them happen.”

My kids are still 3 and 17 months, so I’m guessing a lot of this craziness is still on its way to my house!

What’s your favorite (and by that I mean insane) reason your own kid melted down?

Share it with us in the comments!