There has been a certain stigma around mental illness, certain disorders, or a marriage that needs help, for a very long time. Like anything that would send a person to a therapist’s office is something that shouldn’t be discussed in public – like it’s something to be embarrassed about, something that’s wrong with you, something that’s broken.
More and more people are talking about their experiences with therapy, though, and more than one celebrity couple has talked openly about how going to a counselor together is the best thing they’ve done for keeping things happy and healthy at home.
The latest person to do that is singer Pink, who is married to Carey Hart. The couple has been together for some time – since 2003, though they separated once before their marriage and once after, and recently, Pink opened up on an Instagram Live about how they’re making it work, day-by-day.
“We are not taught as kids how to have relationships, how to get along with people.
I mean, what’s happening in our country right now is a perfect example of that. We don’t know how to love each other, we don’t know how to get along, we don’t know how to communicate.”
Therapy is how, it turns out, even though the singer admits she gets “a lot of sh*t” from people when they find out.
“It’s the only reason that we’re still together.
I think partners, after a long time – I can’t say it’s a man and woman thing, I think it’s a partner thing, a spouse thing – you just speak two different languages.”
She believes that a therapist can be great at “translating” for two people who have grown apart in that way.
One of the most poignant memories she shared was about a moment like that.
“I had been complaining about him for years about he’s just not present, he’s not here, he doesn’t get it, he’s not hearing me emotionally, he’s not even trying to understand my language.
And the therapist was like ‘OK, everybody shut up, stand up, put your hands on each other’s hearts and just look into each other’s eyes.”
“Then this man, that I had been saying won’t show up for me, his feet were planted in that earth, his hand was on my heart and his eyes were looking into my soul and guess what I did? I started giggling and I looked away.”
She went on to say that in that moment, she “realized that I was a little bit full of sh*t. I was the one here that was just talking and there have been many of those times.”
The couple has been together for 14 years, and in Pink’s words, she’s “grateful” to still have him in her life.
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So many years, So many hairstyles @hartluck…..We’ve been at this thing a long time, babe. It isn’t perfect, but I’m grateful it’s ours. I love our family. Thank you for walking in front of me, beside me, and right behind me at times. “You’re a real man, carey hart.” #agreetodisagree #fightnice #wehatethesamepeople #myrock #noonemakesmeangrierthanyou #butyouresuperhot
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Maybe that’s all the endorsement we need for the power of therapy, because staying with one person for 14 years is no easy feat – even for the best of couples.
Congrats, and maybe, think about a therapist in your own life.
I know I’m so glad we pulled that trigger in ours!